I had a terrible weekend, well one incident that made it a terrible weekend. I don't want to go into details because I can go and on and on and on about it. What I will tell you is that I felt hurt and betrayed. Naturally, I went to Don to vent my frustrations. Don tried his best to “be there” for me. He listened and gave me some advice. Told me funny jokes to make me laugh. Tried to distract me by telling me about his day. But, once we got off the phone. I was upset again. He couldn’t be there for me because he is not here with me physically to give me a hug, rub my back and tell me it’s okay. All he can do is listen to me, tell me what he thinks about the whole “drama” and say “I wish I can do more to help, but there is nothing I can do”. I hate that. I hate that whenever one of us go through something, we can’t do anything to help except… "being there".
Language Barrier
As much as I love that we’re an interracial couple, there are times when I wish we weren’t. I wish we came from the same country, culture, speak the same language. English is my first language and Malay, my second. I can speak both fluently and can easily go back and forth speaking both languages in a conversation. But, there are some Malay words that have NO English translation to it. It’s one word to describe that one emotion. One word to describe that one situation (Geram, layan, manja, geli… to name a few). Whenever I try to explain to Don a feeling or a situation, I get really frustrated because the English word for it just does. not. fit. the. emotion. or. situation. So, my story from being super duper funny becomes just funny. Meh.
Lifestyle
We’re super blessed to be in the same timezone. We can wake up and sleep the same time. We don’t have to disrupt our sleep, just so we can talk to each other (I love my sleep). However, even though we are in the same time zone, we are not in the same “time zone”. Our lifestyle is so DIFFERENT. Don wakes up at 7.30am for work, I wake up at 9.30am for work. He gets off at 5 pm, I get off at 7 pm. He goes to bed at 11-12am. I am still out playing futsal or hanging out with friends at 11-12am. He works weekends, I sleep during the weekends. Sometimes, we just have a few minutes between our daily schedule to talk to each other. His lifestyle is much healthier than mine, but I definitely move a lot more than him.
Let me link this whole post for you. I was upset and geram about the incident that happened to me to over the weekend. I went to Don to seek comfort and affection but didn’t get the loving I want because he couldn’t give it to me. He could only comfort me by words and all I wanted were hugs and kisses. While trying to explain to Don my predicament. I felt like I couldn’t tell him the full story to its potential because there are some words I can't translate in English. Urgh, language barrier. When I was telling Don my story, I had just come back from dinner with my family and Don was already in bed. When I was telling him, my story...Don was falling asleep (poor baby, tired from a long-distance drive).
Frustrating isn’t?! Before anyone sends Don hate-mail. I am not frustrated at Don. I am frustrated at this whole “long-distance relationship” thing. I hate this gap between us. I hate feeling helpless. I hate that as much as I hate saying distance is not an issue for me. The distance is number one issue for me.
How do you deal with long-distance frustrations?
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